Watching out

Collaboration is a sticky thing, especially in an industry (field?) like real estate where no one gets a paycheck. Real estate can be a lonely business, with no clear power structure telling you what to do and how to do it, and so collaboration can seem like a welcome shift. But I gotta watch out. Lots of people are willing to share, except when it comes to the paycheck, and determining who did how much work can be tricky. Splitting 50-50 can only work over time, but people are prone to make judgments before "over time" has even happened.

I get really lonely in real estate. I welcome and can thrive in an atmosphere of teamwork and collaboration, but I am not sure I have found the right partner or team yet. I am sure I have found some unsatisfying relationships and one potential right one, but not the one that fits like a glove. I am looking for that space between silence (this is when the sabotaging self-talk creeps in) and chatter (distraction, gossip, your basic blah blah blah, not related to productive).

I have started to notice more things, if not quite act on them (yet). For example, I notice (and sometimes can almost see visually) someone else's (and sometimes my own) negativity or scrambling (for me) energy. I notice how power moves around. I notice when people play it close to the chest. I notice when my own business is charged with energy and when it seems to have no wind in its sails. I think one of the things I am seeking in a business partner is someone to wittingly or unwittingly change that deflated energy. But what I already know is that the business partner has to be me, and that looking outside for a change is never going to produce a satisfying, lasting result, because real energy shifts come from within. FUCK!